this past week hasnt been a great one for me at all..

but i am so glad that it is the weekends already.
friday's church service was awesome.
i really felt comforted by God when Patrice shared with us some
verses that made me feel a lot better after going through this
hellish week..

currently i am facing 2 struggles.

i feel like i struggle a lot in terms of controlling my emotions
and i tend to speak my mind which isn't exactly a very good thing
especially if i am angry...
i need to keep calm and breathe..
esp when it comes to PW.. i just see red whenever someone
can't be bothered to do their work..
i kind of told my 2 grp members off on friday.
i lost it and just told them what i thought about their behaviour.
=/ but i'm workin on it.

the second worst thing that can ever happen to me is
liking someone in school.. i can never do that..
it's just weird and awkward for me.
i was hanging out with my cousin jonathan yesterday
and i really enjoy our hang outs because we always eat great food
and talk about a million things that we are happy about or struggling about..
i can tell him anything and he'd understand.
we were telling each other to like resist the temptation
to have a relationship.. it's like
everywhere we turn we see some random couple holding hands
and stuff but then
HOW MANY OF THEM ACTUALLY LASTS?

i feel this question is SO true.. like
people can tell each other "i love you"
and a million other sweet things but none of
them want to work things out and persevere with one another
when a problem arises. and that part is so scary.
people can be in a relationship for 10 years and still break up.
sonia and i were like talking about like what type of person
we would marry and we were saying we definitely want someone
who really loves God. because someday you might feel sick of that person
and the only common thing to bring the both of you closer together
is the fact that both of you love God.
although it might be super tempting to have a relationship now
which might not even last, i'd rather wait for that someone who loves
God and is willing to make the relationship
last until white hairs grow on my head.

okay okay cheesy i know.
i think i kind of forgot how it feels like to like somebody
else other than my first love. like i just cant imagine being with anyone
else. yesterday i tried to go to his profile
and i couldnt enter it! i thought he deleted me :(
and i was quite sad.. i kept waking up in the middle of the night
with a start.. dunno if it's because of my cat or what..
until now i cannot understand how he can just drop everything
when we've been together for so long.
it sucks to let go.
but yeah. live and learn.
no way am i going to get torn up like that again..
it was during my o level year somemore!
omg. thank god i had the strength to just
push everything aside and study.
my results were WAY better than i expected.
THANK GOD. although i scored like 4As and a B
my JC results are like the total opposite..
like 360.. never seen so much Us in my life before..
and im like part of the dumber population..
zzzz but i know it's cos i never really put in my 100%..
oh well.
BLOGGING LESSER NOW.
facebook is seriously damn distracting.
should i just quit it?!

:)